Skip to main content

We the people of Bengaluru

Today transportation in Bangalore has many options compared to a few years back. You got buses (volvos, pushpaks, red boards, white boards, private) , the notorious autorickshaws (I ll give you a funny analogy of these later in this post, dont forget to read it, it still makes me laugh even after reading a thousand times by now!) , private indicabs, corollas, honda city taxis, the latest sx4 taxis from maruti suzuki, and then you got some 35,678 types of two wheelers (well its just a huge number that came to my mind nothing else!imagine 1500 vehicles getting registered every passing day), and you’ve also now got a trillion bicycles all over our roads. And dont forget the bullock carts, horse tongas, human pulled rickshaws, mini vans, trucks and the list goes on and on and on. Now what happens if you own sand lorries, or cargo vans, and you also have 20 people to ferry? This is what happens



What if you want to carry a military tanker on the roads of Bengaluru? You’ve got a truck for that too, no worries!!



And before I end this post, here is a hilarious excerpt often sent to me by email, to have my share of laughter! Read and enjoy!


Driving in India :: Enjoy your ride!



Basically you start on the left of the road, unless it is occupied. In that case, go to the right, unless that is also occupied. Then proceed by occupying the next available gap, as in chess. Just trust your instincts, ascertain the direction, and proceed. Adherence to road rules leads to much misery and occasional fatality. Most drivers don’t drive, but just aim their vehicles in the intended direction. Don’t you get discouraged or underestimate yourself except for a belief in reincarnation, the other drivers are not in any better position. Don’t stop at pedestrian crossings just because some fool wants to cross the road. You may do so only if you enjoy being bumped in the back. Pedestrians have been strictly instructed to cross only when traffic is moving slowly or has come to a dead stop because some minister is in town. Still some idiot may try to wade across, but then, let us not talk ill of the dead. Blowing your horn is not a sign of protest as in some countries. We blow horn to express joy, resentment, frustration, romance and bare lust (two brisk blasts), or, just mobilize a dozing cow in the middle of the bazaar.


Keep informative books in the glove compartment. You may read them during traffic jams, while awaiting the chief minister’s motorcade, or waiting for the rainwaters to recede when overground traffic meets underground drainage. Night driving on Indian roads can be an exhilarating experience (for those with the mental makeup of Chenghis Khan). In a way, it is like playing Russian roulette, because you do not know who amongst the drivers is loaded. What looks like premature dawn on the horizon turns out to be a truck attempting a speed record. On encountering it, just pull partly into the field adjoining the road until the phenomenon passes. Our roads don’t have shoulders, but occasional boulders. Do not blink your lights expecting reciprocation. The only dim thing in the truck is the driver, and with the peg of illicit arrack (alcohol) he has had at the last stop, his total cerebral functions add up to little more than a naught.


Truck drivers are the James Bonds of India, and are licensed to kill. Often you may encounter a single powerful beam of light about six feet above the ground. This is not a super motorbike, but a truck approaching you with a single light on, usually the left one. It could be the right one, but never get too close to investigate. You may prove your point posthumously. Of course, all this occurs at night,on the trunk roads. During the daytime, trucks are more visible, except that the drivers will never show any Signal. (And you must watch for the absent signals; they are the greater threat). Only, you will often observe that the cleaner who sits next to the driver, will project his hand and wave hysterically. This is definitely not to be construed as a signal for a left turn. The waving is just an ex-pression of physical relief on a hot day. Occasionally you might see what looks like a UFO with blinking colored lights and weird sounds emanating from within. This is an illuminated bus, full of happy pilgrims singing bhajans. These pilgrims go at breakneck speed, seeking contact with the Almighty, often meeting with success.


Auto Rickshaw (Baby Taxi): The result of a collision between a rickshaw and an automobile, this three-wheeled vehicle works on an external combustion engine that runs on a mixture of kerosene, oil and creosote. This triangular vehicle carries iron rods, gas cylinders or passengers three times its weight and dimension, at an unspecified fare. After careful geometric calculations, children are folded and packed into these auto rickshaws until some children in the periphery are not in contact with the vehicle at all. Then their school bags are pushed into the microscopic gaps all round so those minor collisions with other vehicles on the road cause no permanent damage. Of course, the peripheral children are charged half the fare and also learn Newton’s laws of motion enroute to school. Auto rickshaw drivers follow the road rules depicted in the film Ben Hur, and are licensed to irritate.


Mopeds: The moped looks like an oil tin on wheels and makes noise like an electric shaver. It runs 30 miles on a teaspoon of petrol and travels at break-bottom speed. As the sides of the road are too rough for a ride, the moped drivers tend to drive in the middle of the road; they would rather drive under heavier vehicles instead of around them and are often ’mopped’ off the tarmac.


Leaning Tower of Passes: Most bus passengers are given free passes and during rush hours, there is absolute mayhem. There are passengers hanging off other passengers, who in turn hang off the railings and the overloaded bus leans dangerously, defying laws of gravity but obeying laws of surface tension. As drivers get paid for overload (so many Rupees per kg of passenger), no questions are ever asked. Steer clear of these buses by a width of 3 passengers. One-way Street: These boards are put up by traffic people to add jest in their otherwise drab lives. Don’t stick to the literal meaning and proceed in one direction. In metaphysical terms, it means that you can’t proceed in two directions at the same time. So drive as you like, in reverse throughout, if you are the fussy type.


Lest I sound hypercritical, I must add a positive point also. Rash and fast driving in residential areas has been prevented by providing a ’speed breaker’; two for each house. This mound, incidentally, covers the water and drainage pipes for that residence and is left untarred for easyidentification by the corporation authorities, should they want to recover the pipe for year-end accounting. If, after all this, you still want to drive in India, have your lessons between 8 pm and 11 am when the police have gone home and the citizen is then free to enjoy the ’Freedom of Speed’ enshrined in our constitution.


Having said all this, isn’t it true that the accident rate and related deaths are less in India compared to US or other countries?


Technorati Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Car Rentals in Kuala Lumpur - SoCar vs GoCar

IntroductionAs I was headed to Malaysia for a trip for 10 days, I needed an option to commute within the country. While renting cabs with drivers was definitely an option, there was no privacy enough, and there was no way to make my own decisions on where I wished to go when. I was not so keen to rent a cab outside of KL city.We had plans to visit multiple places such as Cameron, Penang, Langkawi so I needed a vehicle which I was willing to drive myself. It was the best option as it would give me the convenience without burning a hole in my pocket. The trip itself was turning out to be expensive and I wanted a good option for inside the country travel.Things that I was looking forAs any first time car rental customer, I had some concerns, so I needed theseEasy rental mechanism, including driver sign up and validation of
licensePreferably use local Karnataka (state license from india) - without the need for IDPApp based car handlingEasy fuelingEasy breakdown service if needed anywhere …

How to cover Malaysia in 10 days - full details on a self planned trip

Some history Ever since 2016 my wife and I decided that we want to do one international trip (though not necessarily one country) every year. We made it to Singapore in 2016, and Dubai in 2017. It was time to explore and take my family to Malaysia this time around in 2018.

The fact that I was working in Malaysia in 2002 and could not get time in the short one year that I stayed there to see many places only meant the urge to go there was pretty strong in order that I could get another chance to cover all the places I did not see this time around.

Also 15 years down the line with a lot of instrastructure and convenience improvements happening around the world, surely the trip would seemingly put me at more ease than earlier on. So it was time to decide how to plan the trip.

My logic for planning trips I usually do my own booking and planning for everything for my trip. I look through places to visit, I look through multiple sources of reviews, I look through the best times to travel t…

Veg Biriyani Recipe

IngredientsOne Potato - dices into small cube sized pieces and soak in waterBeans - about 10 of them chopped into medium pieces, soak in waterCarrot - about 2 of them chopped into medium pieces, and soak in waterOnions - big ones, 2 of them sliced thin and longGreen peas - a handfulMint and Coriander leaves - one medium sized bowlGhee - 2 to 3 teaspoonsCurd - 4 tea spoonsGroundnut oil - 4 to 6 teaspoons for the onions to caramelize (same can be later used for vegetables to be cooked), 4 teaspoons for the spices to be cooked along with riceBasmati rice - One cup upto brim (standard cup measure)Multi spices pack - 2 packs (contains cloves, elaichi, cinnamon, star anise)Bay leaves - 3-4 for vegetables, 2-3 for riceShahi jeera - for vegetables (2-3 teaspoons)Turmeric powder, chilli powder, garam masala, biriyani masala, salt, cumin powderGinger garlic paste - 2-3 teaspoonsMethi leaves - half a handfulChillies to taste (I used one long chilli, you can desire to add 2) - diced into medium p…